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What’s that I hear you say? You’re going to have to tell them, you know. Speak up! Hey I can’t hear you! They said WHAT? That’s not okay!
For the past few weeks now I have been presented with unrelenting opportunities to voice my truth and expression and I can tell you it’s been a rollercoaster ride!
Tonight I am under the pump with two deadlines regarding the typesetting of my book in readiness for my May launch. But I really did want to touch base with you about what I have been learning these past two months regards having to stand in my power, and in particular, my power of voicing things – whether that be in writing or verbally.
You know, it’s my sense that we all have a particular relationship with voicing things. You either love it or hate it or, more likely, you have areas of life where you are in your element with it and areas where you’d rather run a mile. Think about it…
Speaking what is true for you
Speaking what you love
Speaking about what is not OK – in the world, and for you
Speaking what needs to be done, and when, and by whom
Speaking what is uncomfortable and not just what is comfortable
Speaking about what you want as well as what you don’t want
Speaking the facts and what is clearly so
Speaking in a quiet tone; a loving tone; a firm yet respectful tone…
…or if required – a ROAR!
I could go on but you get my drift.
Speaking out can feel pretty squirmy at times.
There can be the fear of whether we have irritated someone in doing so, or the concern there may be serious repercussions if we speak.
Many of us can get so mentally preoccupied with what people will think of us that we get tongue tied.
Or we can visit that nervous uncertainty about whether we will be heard or our words received and understood the way that we intend or desire.
And sometimes in the background, there can be fear of losing control of yourself, or of unleashing a personal attack on another person if our expression takes place in an unconscious manner.
I have visited all of these squirms and more during the past two months.
Having to deal with situations such a someone else’s major repairs on all three levels of your home, builders displaying passive aggressive behaviour, incidents of serious health and safety negligence, and folk taking liberties, will tend to bring those ”speaking-out” squirms right up to the surface!
As will folk who project their own unowned issues, perceptions, or assumptions and then name them as yours.
Or you asking others that they help you, support you, and endorse you in your endeavors.
But here’s what I know:
Choosing openhearted living is about choosing to be fully expressed and in your power – with your FULL and true voice intact, and with your FULL self-awareness in tow.
It is NOT about expressing in such a way that you:
- Go around being a people-pleaser in a bid to not ‘’lose the love’’. This behaviour is just an unconscious strategy to manipulate others into getting them to give you what you think you need from them in order for you to believe you are safe or OK.
- Present a ”nice” shop-front façade of yourself so that anything you deem “not nice” is not on show. This only puts up an unconscious wall between you and others which leads to experiences of disconnect and separation.
- Remain mute on the outside yet continue a seething dialogue on the inside between the voices in your head, speaking out in your imagination all the things you are too afraid to say into your external world. This ultimately serves no-one’s highest good. It closes down the heart, removes you from the present, and obstructs the chance for real communication.
- Be love and light and spiritually superior – whilst bypassing what you really feel, ignoring what is really not OK for you, and so not meeting your own deep needs.
- Try and appear as someone who has their life ‘’in control’’ and who never ‘’loses it’’. Such a stance closes the lid on the beneficial aspects of the primal life force that is your creative nature and the nature of every human-divine.
- Disown anything that you are reactive to and have an emotional charge about, by simply dumping it on another and re-presenting it as their fault, their issue, their thoughts and feelings.
Perhaps I will write another note on this topic soon.