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This week it’s short and sweet from me.
I have no story for you.
And that’s okay.
It’s been a very potent few days, not just the macro but the micro, although it is one and the same.
This week my communication and relating has not wanted to be ‘’out there, with the out-there world’’.
It has needed to be with me, with my deeper, ‘’in-here’’ world.
Observing, and feeling, and honouring what is arising within.
And I have needed to be fully present to do that.
Because I can’t deeply be with me if I am yakking away ‘’out there’’. (I know what I am like )
I can’t do it if I am too busy perpetuating the drama, listening to the crowd telling me how to be right now, how I should act, what I should feel, what opinion to uphold and espouse in public, what needs to be done, what might be coming next, and so on.
I can’t do it if I am too busy rushing into ‘’out-there’’ actions from a reactive space or a disconnected space.
I can’t do it if I am too busy powering some false notion that I have to be leading and sharing a view, ‘’having my say’’
We’re all different. This is just how it has been for me.
Along with a sunrise or two
I have been asking myself some very deep questions. Questions that began with:
Where do I get ‘’triggered’’ to ‘’pull the trigger’’ and ‘’fire’’ on myself and on others? How will I change this?
Where do I still separate, not deeply hear another, and make wrong because of perceived differences. How will I change this?
In what ways do I still perpetuate violence and hatred on self and others? How will I change this?
I have begun the tentative steps of living those new answers in my immediate world.
Meanwhile other questions have risen up to take their place.
In fact so much has been shifting and arising within.
It has been uncomfortable.
To be squeezed by excruciating pressures to drop what isn’t true.
Especially when these squeezes – as has been my case – also relate to questions about deep personal values, about changing the priorities of one’s own life, and about the manner in which our personal and professional life is set up – and whether that set-up continues to feel congruent.
But I do know it’s alchemical.
And, that as well as it being the case in the ‘’out-there’’ world, something is also most definitely afoot for me in my ‘’in-here’’ world.
This week’s note is to say I love you.
I am sending love to you.
And just being with what is here.